From Victim to Victor

I recently reconnected with a childhood friend. On the one hand, he is a person whose physical footprints in the sands of my life’s journey were few. Yet, like a well crafted sandcastle, even three decades of hurricane force tides of suffering, pain and darkness, couldn’t remove the evidence that something noble was once there. Orphaned and abandoned as a teen, the storm surge hit and, in a flash of flood waters, our families were separated. Whisked away by the rising water over the next fifteen years of my life, sporadically finding refuge between the bands of increasing intensity, I learned what it meant to live the life of a victim. With each wave of debris crashing down around me, I brought with me the remnants of the wreckage left by the last. There was no time to regroup or heal wounds. Survival was my only agenda, while crawling deeper inside a safe place created within myself. Oh, such is the plight of the oppressed who know not of a safer place into the arms of a Savior.

It would be fifteen years, before I would find my way to the door of my first pastor and closest friend, who would rescue this broken child of God and, ultimately lead me straight to His heart forever, through a moment of forgiveness. I often wondered, “Where was God?” in my struggle, but have come to understand, He was there in the suffering. It was He who led me to those places of refuge between the bands of the storm, and He who groomed in me a heart for the weak, the lost, the suffering and the broken. Through my own years on the path from victim to victor, I found my life’s calling – not in spite of it, but because of it.

It has been fifteen years as well since the Bosnian War. The prejudices and unforgiveness still riddle the various ethnicities that comprise this country. The “victim mentality” is being passed down to a generation of children who do not recall the war, only inherited the pain of it. Forced to choose survival, there are masses of people still crawling deep inside themselves, carrying the burdens and wreckage of war, not only from their own experiences but from those they love as well. Imagine it! The victim of the victim. The layers of agony. The weight of such deep anguish. The not knowing of a lighter yoke to carry. "For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:30)

Our July team experienced one of those rare paradigm shifts through some work they did in partnership with Novi Most, the youth center run by Mick and Ali Holstead. The summer program was a virtual trip around the world. It was the “trip” to Haiti, which brought the most glory. The youth creatively raised funds for the earthquake survivors and restoration efforts of perhaps our world’s poorest country. Through interactive game play and festivities not common to Bosnia, all nationalities amassed in public squares for prior generations to see their hearts for others. We are beginning to witness this young generation refusing their inheritance. Refusing to be unforgiving, and choosing to come together instead and make a difference for the betterment of our world – to know the glory, joy and peace which comes from having an “others first” mentality, and remove the label of victim, replacing it with victor!

I am grateful to my rediscovered friend, who has catapulted me back to one of the darkest yet biggest turning points in my life – the end of innocence and beginning of an arduous journey to the foot of the cross. It has served as a powerful reminder of the healing balm of Jesus and the glory of the cross … where forgiveness begins, where hatred ends, where victims become victors again.

"Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked."

Psalm 82:3-4

In the grip of His grace,
Kathy